What was she thinking?
by JoniLuvsChachi
Summary: Lance got himself into a whole mess of hot water with Allura during The Stolen Lion (DotU, S.1 Ep.8). This is my interpretation of Lance's interpretation of the events of that episode. No pairings - very weak implied K/A. Rated T for Language, but nothing too severe. Never to be taken too seriously. Just having a bit of fun :) COMPLETE


**One of my new year's resolutions was to write more. Even if it's just some trivial stuff that I feel like getting down on paper, it still counts, right? So, I am currently working on the sequel to Band on the Run, but since I needed a break but still needed to be writing, I decided on this. **

**Set in very early DotU during The Stolen Lion. This is Lance's interpretation of the events that happened. I always felt like the episode was rather silly (but it is still one of my favorites) and that my boy, Lance, kinda got a raw deal when he seemed to be the only one who had a clue throughout the whole thing.**

**No pairings, but very weak implied K/A.**

**Enjoy, and please remember to review. :)**

1.

Blue Lion was falling – spiraling, out of control – towards the earth below. Lance watched in horror at his own handy work. It hadn't been his intention to knock the princess out of the sky. Before Red and Blue had even taken to the sky earlier that day, he and Keith had discussed the training scenarios that would be appropriate for Allura, considering her lack of actual combat experience. Keith had told Lance under no certain terms that he would take it easy on her until she got familiar with Blue Lion's quirks and was able to keep her cool under fire.

At first, she had taken instruction well, but her reflexes left much to be desired. After a few maneuvers, she started getting a little too comfortable, obviously because she knew that Lance was not really going to treat her to a full on assault. She even got a little cocky. So, Lance had decided to up the stakes and launched Red Lion's blade at her. He hadn't meant to hit her head on, but she had jerked in the wrong direction at the last moment, allowing the blade to smack her right on Blue's snout. It was enough to jar the lion and its pilot.

Allura's screams pierced his cockpit, only ceasing right before Blue started its unintended descent. Lance panicked momentarily, knowing that there was no way in hell that he would be able to stop the fall. On the ground he could see Keith, Hunk, and Pidge scrambling to their lions. _Man, Keith is going to kick the shit out of me._

He kicked Red Lion into high gear and raced toward the falling princess. He could hear Keith's own concerns through the speakers. "Can't make it!" the commander said.

Then something completely unexpected happened. A ship appeared out of nowhere, easily outpacing Red Lion as it targeted Blue with its tractor beam. Lance watched dumbfounded as the ship slowed Blue Lion's descent.Then a new voice came through, "Everything's under control. You won't be needed. Thank you for your help...such as it was."

Lance ground his teeth as the Voltron Force surrounded Blue as the ship laid her gently on the ground. _Where the hell did this asshole come from, _he thought, _and where does he get off talking to me like that? _ Red Lion touched down, and Lance couldn't get out of his chair fast enough. By the time he crawled out of the hatch a top Red Lion's head, Nanny had already pulled Allura from her downed lion, and introductions were being made.

The ship's pilot was a tall, sinewy man with long, white hair that blew gloriously in the breeze. He was good looking. Too good looking in Lance's opinion. Added to that, Lance decided that he was way overdressed for a guy just traveling randomly in space. He just really didn't like the guy.

"I am Prince Volkar of Synac. I have been searching the galaxy for a beautiful princess who will agree to be my bride."

Lance almost choked on his own laughter. Who says that when you first meet someone? From the irritated expression on Allura's face, she was having none of it. _Good girl. _Lance crossed his arms and watched from his perch while Nanny scolded the man quite vehemently.

Volkar treated them to a humble smile, that was obviously fake, and said, "Do I look like I would harm you, Princess? I would never do anything that would bring you the slightest pain or uneasiness."

Lance almost fell over when Allura blushed. She actually blushed! Then in her melodic, sweet voice, she said, "how very sweet and kind."

_WHAT? _Lance's next words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. "So sweet, it's sickening, if you ask me. And if you ask me, I don't believe a word of it."

Volkar turned to glare up at him. "You there, come down here."

"Alright!" Lance crowed and launched himself from the top of Red Lion, treating everyone to front flip just before he landed. He knew it was a little showy, but he was itching to put this so-called prince in his place. "Here I am, your high and mighty Majesty."

Volkar narrowed his eyes at him. "Now it seems that I must teach you some manners."

"Bring it on, Prince," Lance growled as he moved into his fighting stance. He launched himself at Volkar who sidestepped his right hook. Fortunately, Lance was ambidextrous when it came to fighting. His left jab connected to Volkar's chin, sending the man reeling backwards. "Enough?" Lance asked, but silently hoping that this douche bag would get back up for some more. He was not disappointed.

Volkar stood up, wiping a small trickle of blood from his chin. "Enough? My dear boy, I haven't even started."

The prince flew at Lance so fast the he barely had time to move as a fist connected with his jaw, knocking him back against Red Lion's steel claw. Blood poured out of his split lip. He had not expected Volkar to be that fast, and the man was definitely stronger than he looked. He came at Lance again. This time he was ready and dodged the attack. He countered with a swift front snap kick to Volkar's gut. The prince staggered but quickly regained his footing. "You want some more?

Somewhere in the background, Lance could hear Allura pleading with the others to stop the fight. He didn't have to look to know that his teammates had not moved from their spectator positions. They had an unwritten rule about fighting going back to their Academy days. If someone picked a fight with one of them, then he picked a fight with all of them. However, if one of them picked a fight with someone else, he was in it by himself. Lance had picked this fight, and he knew that the others would not step in to help. Even if it meant getting his ass handed to him.

Lance moved to throw a punch, but Volkar caught his wrist and pulled him in to land an upper knee strike to Lance's sternum. The breath was knock out of his lungs and lay on the ground stunned. The sensation was momentary. The pain was not. Lance tried to get to his feet, but Volkar had other plans. He attacked again with a low, round house kick to the side of Lance's head. From the impact, Lance was grateful that he had left his helmet on, but it didn't stop the stars from dancing before his eyes or the feeling of his brain being scrambled around inside his skull. He mentally prepared himself for another assault, but Allura's cries stopped Volkar in his tracks.

"Stop it! Both of you."

From his position on the ground, Lance could hear his teammates' footsteps. "You heard her," Keith was saying, "you made your point. Now, leave him alone."

Lance snorted. Leave it to Keith to only intervene when his precious princess asked.

Volkar moved toward Allura, deliberately ignoring Keith. He bowed deeply. "Princess Allura's wish is my command."

Lance watched the scene from where he was still laying on the ground. He felt like he wanted to throw up, but he wasn't sure if it was because he had just been kicked in the gut or if it was Volkar's sickening, honey dripping voice. Hunk and Pidge arrived at his side and hauled him painfully to his feet.

"You all right, Lance?" Pidge asked.

He touched his lip tenderly. The bleeding had slowed and in a few hours his lip would swell and turn a lovely shade of purple. "Yeah, I'll be fine. I've had worse." He turned his attention back to the conversation at hand.

Volkar had dropped to one knee in front of the princess. "Sorry I upset you." He got to his feet and turned back toward his ship. _Good riddance, _Lance thought. _The sooner that jackass gets off this planet, the better._

Then the unthinkable happened.

"Prince Volkar wait!" Allura called to him. "Please don't go. You saved my life."

The prince turned back to look at her and flashed her a smile that would make him a contender for the Sexiest Man on the Planet award. And she blushed. AGAIN! Coran and Nanny now got into the mix, fawning all over Volkar, even going so far as to invite the crazy prince to stay in the castle. Had they lost their freaking minds?

Hunk and Pidge tried to hold him back, but he pushed himself away from them. "How do we know he's a prince? And how do we where he really comes from? No Prince goes cruising around space by himself." He made a point to make eye contact with everyone present. Surely someone would understand his argument and back him up.

The only response was a stern speech from Allura about how Volkar saved her life and blah, blah, blah...

"I owe my life to Prince Volkar," she finished.

Was she being serious right now? Lance blinked at her in utter shock. He knew that the Princess of Arus was fairly naive when it came to opposite sex, but surly even she could see that she was being plain dumb right now. Lance looked at Keith and silently pleaded with the commander to take his side on this one. Allura would listen to him. Then the other shoe dropped.

"Come on, why don't the two of you shake hands?" was Keith's only response.

Finally having enough, Lance rounded on Keith. "This guy fights like a space pirate! I'll never trust him." To give emphasis to his rant, he crossed his arms and stuck his nose in the air.

Allura was having none of it. She made it perfectly clear – after hurling a few minor insults at Lance – that Volkar was welcome to stay at the castle for as long as he wanted. Once Nanny announced that she was making a special supper in honor of the prince, the discussion was over.

As the others began to retrieve their vehicles to return to the castle, Lance grabbed Keith by the arm. "What's up, Keith? You're the one who's always the stickler for security and protocol. You're not going to back me up on this?"

Keith glanced around, and they both noticed Allura watching them, listening. The commander cleared his throat. "I think maybe you are just overreacting, Lance. He doesn't seem like such a bad guy."

Lance stared at him, absolutely stunned, but when he saw Keith glance back at the princess and nod, his surprise faded. Allura returned the nod and a small smile before turning back to Blue Lion. Had Keith really fallen under the fair princess' spell so hard that he would do anything she asked of him? Even if it meant letting some stranger into the castle? He ground his teeth as Keith made his way towards Black Lion. He was going to find out the answer to those questions as soon as he got the chance.

2.

As soon as he could, Lance cornered the rest of the team – minus Allura, of course – in the rec room and let them have it.

"You guys are seriously okay with this guy shacking up in the castle? We don't know anything about him!" He stared each one of them down one by one.

Hunk leaned back casually in his chair, propping his hands behind his head. "The princess didn't know anything about us either. But she let us stay."

"Yeah," Pidge agreed, "and besides, she seems like she has her mind made up. Not really much we can do about that. Why does Volkar bother you so much anyway?"

Hunk snorted. "Maybe he's jealous. Maybe he wants to keep the princess all to himself." He and Pidge burst into uncontrolled laughter.

"WHAT? Are you two out of your minds? I never...I'm not..." Lance was stammering, but for some reason couldn't make himself stop. Finally he yelled, "IT"S NOT LIKE THAT!" He crossed his arms firmly to his chest and sulked.

The laughter finally subsided, and Hunk and Pidge only watched him, clearly unconvinced by his argument.

Lance narrowed his eyes at Keith, who had been thoughtfully quiet. "Well, Keith? You're the one who is always so keen on doing whatever it takes to keep Allura safe. Or are you so caught up in the princess that you'll let her railroad you without a fight? Come on, man, you never let a woman come between you and protocol before."

From the frown on Keith's face, Lance was almost afraid that he had crossed a line. But at the moment, he really didn't care. He had a very bad feeling about Volkar, and if he had to incur the commander's wrath to make him see the light, then so be it.

Instead of indulging Lance and his train of thought, Keith simply said, "I grew up with two sisters, Lance."

"So,"

"So," Keith continued, "if there is one thing that I know about women is that if they are into a guy, the very last thing you should do is let on that you don't like him."

"Ah ha!" Lance cried triumphantly. "So you do think he's up to something!"

He could tell that Keith wanted to deny the fact, but he didn't. "I think we should keep an eye on him. But you have to stop being an ass to him. Allura will see through him soon enough. But we have to let her do it on her own terms. Otherwise we're just spinning our wheels."

Lance was going to say something else, but was interrupted when the door opened and Allura stuck her head into the room. "Nanny said to call you to dinner."

"Awesome!" Hunk cried, "I'm starving."

Allura had to step aside as he and Pidge nearly knocked her down to get into the corridor. She eyeballed Lance as he and Keith emerged. "I assume everyone is going to be on their best behavior?" she asked.

"That's a promise, Princess," Keith answered for him, cutting his eyes at Lance.

Lance gave her the widest smile he could manage. "I'll be a perfect angel," he said as he moved passed her. His smile faded as soon as he was well ahead of her in the corridor, as he wondered idly how in the hell he was going to be able to fake it through an entire meal with Prince Volkar.

3.

As it turned out, he couldn't fake it. He had tried. He kept his mouth shut when Allura insisted that Volkar take the seat to her right – the place usually reserved for Keith. He bit is lip when Allura led them all in a sappy toast to the prince. He counted to ten, then a hundred, while Nanny mooned over him while simultaneously finding time to scold Lance for not sitting properly at the table. It was absolutely miserable. On the plus side, he was glad that he had not been sitting within leg's reach of Keith, because from the stern looks he was receiving from the commander, he would have had some very sore shins by the time dessert arrived.

Finally, towards the end of the meal, he could take the oohs and ahhs no longer. He had stood up and announced that if they wanted to protect the royal silverware, they would put a double lock on it while their guest was in the castle. Before anyone could get on his case about it, he had stomped out of the dining hall and back to the confines of his own sleeping quarters.

Even he had to admit that the whole affair had been a bit juvenile, and as he lay in the dark, staring up at the ceiling, he wished he had thought of something better than the damned silverware. _Whatever, _he thought, turning to his side and crushing his pillow under his head, _they're asking for whatever happens next. _Then he would laugh at them and say he told them so. It was those thoughts that finally settled him enough to drift off to sleep.

Lance had no idea how long he had been asleep when he was roused awake by a slithering sensation on top of his blanket. Then he heard the hissing. He barely registered his own scream before he bolted out of bed just in time to dodge the first pair of fangs that came at him. The cobra snapped it's jaw shut in mid-air and dropped back down to the bed. "Shit!" he yelled again as the cobra slithered off the bed to the floor and came after him. Another moved out from under the bed. A third fell from the vent in the ceiling, blocking Lance from his escape route.

Thinking quickly, he bolted to the bedside table, yanked the drawer open, and pulled out his short saber. As he turned, one of the snakes had launched itself at him. _What the hell? These things can fly?_

He slashed haphazardly through the air, cutting the serpent's throat. It fell instantly to the ground, dead.

Outside in the corridor, he could hear more scuffles and the grunts and groans of Keith, Hunk, and Pidge. He turned again to face the remaining two snakes. They came at him one right after the other. He shot his foot out to knock the first one out of the air, while slashing at the other one. It's head came clean off. The remaining cobra lay dazed at his feet. He quickly dropped to his knees and in one swift stroke gutted the monster.

By the time he made it into the corridor, Keith, Hunk, and Pidge had already taken care of their reptile problem. Lance estimated around fifteen snakes lay dead at their feet. He took a big breath to slow his still thumping heart.

"Alright," he said between breaths, "I tried to tell all of you. Prince Volkar is a snake, and he's brought all of his friends with him.

Things went from bad to worse as Volkar came tearing down the corridor.

"I heard yelling," he said, "what is it?"

Keith quickly relayed the story of the cobras, and Volkar actually had the audacity to act surprised at the news. Lance's patience was wearing very thin, but he let Keith take the lead when he suggested that they take their 'problem' to Coran.

4.

The sun was barely showing itself over the Arus landscape, when the team finally had Allura, Coran, and Volkar gathered in Castle Control. Lance felt a little better now that Keith and the others were finally on board. Now they just had to convince Coran and Allura.

"Coran, you have got to do something about Volkar!" he announced, "He's a menace to us all."

Coran, still half asleep, rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "What has he done?"

"What about those Cobras?" Pidge jumped in.

"You blame him?" Coran asked.

Lance snorted. He didn't care if he did sound childish, he was going to get through to them. "Well we didn't have cobras before he dropped in."

"First rule of law is never accuse without proof," Volkar stated in his annoyingly arrogant voice. "You have no proof."

Now Keith stepped forward. "No proof, but strong suspicion."

Allura stood up and looked at them all. Lance held his breath. If anyone could get through to the naive princess, it was Keith. "Coran and I trust Volkar completely. We've decided to ask him to become a member of the Voltron Force."

Lance's jaw dropped. _Jesus Christ, shit just went off the rails very quickly. This is not happening. _He wanted to pull his hair out. No, he wanted to pull her hair out. She was out of her ever loving mind. He glanced at Keith and could see his own thoughts mirrored in the commander's expression. He was not a happy camper.

Coran began to drone on about how inappropriate it was for the princess to pilot the Blue Lion and blah, blah, blah...Then, Lance, Keith, Hunk, and Pidge stood frozen in place as Allura handed over the key to Blue Lion.

That's when he saw it. Something was moving around underneath Volkar's tunic, and Lance had a pretty good idea of what it was. With lightening fast speed, he drew his blaster from the holster on his hip and fired. The blast barely grazed Volkar's arm, slicing an opening in his sleeve.

"Don't shoot!" Keith ordered loudly.

Nanny – poor, sappy, pathetic Nanny – stepped in front of Volkar. "You will have to shoot through me first!" she cried out at him.

"Look at his arm!" Lance said.

Then all hell broke loose as the cobras slithered out of Volkar's sleeve. In the chaos Volkar managed to take Allura hostage and escape with her in her Blue Lion. Of course, the rest of the team went after them. In the end, Allura had opened the escape hatch to the lion, catapulting Volkar, who had now transformed into his true reptilian form, into the atmosphere. From there, it was pretty much cake as they formed Voltron and quickly disposed of their unwanted guest.

5.

Only a few hours later, Allura was returned to her throne, and all was well on Arus once again. The Voltron Force stood before the princess, receiving their well-deserved praises.

"Well Princess Allura," Lance said with his usual ego ridden manner, "looks like everything turned out alright. It's a good thing some of us aren't taken in by a handsome face like Nanny here."

In spite of the fact that Allura had been horribly embarrassed by the whole ordeal (apologizing to Lance over and over again), she laughed loudly. "Yes, Nanny you're as bad as I am. We're two of a kind. Coran, watch me carefully so that it never happens again."

Lance was quite pleased with himself that he had managed to make Allura see the error of her ways. He grinned at Keith who only rolled his eyes.

"Unless I want it to," she finished with a stupid, goofy grin on her face.

Lance slapped his hand over his face. The girl really was hopeless.


End file.
